Understanding my Mama a little more

This is not a light hearted post. This weekend I came face to face with a bit more understanding. My mother is a baby nurse and for her entire career has walked through different stages of loss and grief with families who loose their tiny babies in the hospital. On top of being directly involved with families she also hears and knows all the confidential background of many many tragic stories.

I am not able to go into detail for confidentiality reasons, but this weekend I was on the outskirt involvement of a family who's story turned the wrong direction. Tragedy involving a child my child's age. A story too close to home, empathy that brought many tears and made it difficult to go in and do my job.

I don't know how my mother didn't have nervous break downs through out the first years of my brother's and I's lives. She knows and has seen too much. She didn't bundle us in bubble wrap or hover over our every move, as much as I'm sure she would have liked too. I tend not to be a fearful or worrying type of person, but everyday as a parent is a battle against fear and worry.

Life continues to point me in the direction of thoughts in the line of "Live and love as much and often as you can because there are no guarantees, life can change in an instant."

Breastfeeding

Umm... for some reason I have been having breastfeeding thoughts lately. As Autumn approaches a year, friends are interested in when I plan to ween. I've put some thought into it, but kind of just figure I'll just kind of go with whatever. It is so convenient and more and more so, as she eats less often. I love that she is getting antibodies with the nutrients too.

Just few months ago I dreamed of not leaking, having no pain and not having to time exercise around feedings. Making it to a year seemed like a long shot. Now I'm still breastfeeding and all these issues are non-issues - now it seems so much more complicated to store and carry another source of milk, wash bottles, guess how much she will drink... Breastfeeding seems so much easier.

Tonight I was reading some information on breastfeeding into toddlerhood.

In addition to other benefits, with just 15 ounces of breast milk she is getting

• 29% of energy requirements
• 43% of protein requirements
• 36% of calcium requirements
• 75% of vitamin A requirements
• 76% of folate requirements
• 94% of vitamin B₁₂ requirements
• 60% of vitamin C requirements

http://www.kellymom.com/bf/bfextended/ebf-benefits.html

So, I'll eat my words "once she can ask for 'booby' - I think I'll be done" and see what happens. There are just so many health benefits for her and myself if we continue and I'm not one to care too much about what other people think. Social norms in America say breastfeeding should be done by age one, but most of the world feeds their children human milk until 2-4 years of age... To each her own... every child, unique needs... this is our journey...

11 months old

You were 11 months old a few days ago and you are growing up so fast. It is hard to imagine that in a few short weeks we will be celebrating your 1^st birthday. This has been a very busy month and you are as busy as a little bee. This month the best words to describe you are determined and a girl who know what she wants. We have had so much fun watching you change more and more from a baby into a little girl. You love to giggle, hug, pat, goober, move, stuff things places, carry bags around, discover and adventure.

Mama and you were able to go visit your new baby cousin Eric in Maryland and see your Uncle Chad and Aunt Christie. We had a great time hanging out, you loved looking and trying to touch and pat baby Eric, climbing up and down their stairs and giggling with Uncle Chad. We all went to Washington DC to see the animals at the National Zoo and to a fun little English Pub in downtown. You did not have a great interest in the slow moving animals but did watch the monkeys a bit. Our plane was delayed on our way home and you were an angel the entire 9 hours it took to get home, landing in St. Louis, Kanasas City and then finally Denver.

This month you did your first overnights away from Mama. One night with Dada while Mama went backpacking and another with Dada, Nana and Granddad while Mama worked in Loveland, and one with just Nana and Granddad while Mama and Dada went to Mama’s high school reunion. You did very well without Mama, and probably slept better without the temptation of nice warm milk and mama cuddles close at hand.

Your accomplishments have been mastering the stairs up and down, getting off the couch by your self, being able to walk on pretty much any surface – grass, small hills, through small rocks…, pretty consistantly waving hi and bye, waving as we walk out the door before we say good bye, consistantly calling us mama and da, minding us sometimes when we say no, saying Ahhhh?.?. to see where we are in the house, giving us goobers regularly, hugging your baby doll and giving her kisses, and feeding your self pretty much all your finger food.

Your Nana used to tell Mama that she hopes Mama gets a girl just like her and I think she may have gotten her wish! Your Mama was very much like you at your age – busy, opinionated, happy when doing what she wanted to do. These can all be good things, but it means we are going butt heads from time to time when our agendas differ. Just know that I love you and want the best for you, even when our ideas are different!

Well, here's to 11 wonderful months. Thank you for all the love, joy, and smiles you have brought to our lives. We love you so much and look forward to this last month of infanthood with you!

Mama and Dada