I'm not sure where to start this posting. Life is good, but life is hard. There is much for us to be excited about - new life and by golly - we do live in Hawaii. However, life in Hawaii is hard right now. We really for the most part loved our life in Kona, our friends, our jobs, our church, our community... We haven't been able to find any of these sames loves here on Maui. I mentioned that my job is stressful - on occasion I break down and cry saying I can't do it any more. It is demanding, but that is not the real problem. There are a couple of parents here that have been disgruntled for a while about OT services because they can't keep an OT here in this job for more than 3-12 months. There have been 7 OT's in this particular school in the last 3 years. I think the piece these parents are missing, is that the way they treat the therapists may have a great deal to do with the amount of turn over. I've never felt more disrespected, unappreciated, and degraded in any job I've ever had. If I was not under contract to stay here - and had other job options close, I'd be gone, gone, gone. I am now in limbo waiting for the administration to figure out how to remove me from these cases. I think I'm the first person to stand up and refuse to bear the brunt of the anger and frustration that is misdirected and unreasonable. No other therapist I work with is willing to take these cases from me - as they have been hearing for years or have experienced first hand the abuse. Now I wait, wait and hope that there are options. So that is where I am - praying for a solution and trying very hard not to let the situation drag me down.
The other pieces that have made this transition difficult - Aaron is having a very hard time finding employment that will hire him for the short time we are here, we haven't found friends near us in Kihei - but we really can blame this on ourselves as we haven't tried very hard and last, all these things make me want to close my eyes and appear in Loveland - home, sweet home. I know I need to stay here until June, I know that God will give me the strength to finish my job here and I know that there is more joy to be had here in Maui for me. Knowing all these things, I still struggle, struggle with why we got moved here, why I have to be dealing with all of this when our first child is growing inside of me?
So here I sit - waiting, wondering and trying very hard to not let my mind and my interpretation of circumstances ruin God's promises to me. In the scheme of life, I know this is minor... but I will be ready to be on the other side of it all!
2 comments:
Oh, I feel for you right now. It's tough to be in a place that isn't "home" or even close! Plus, when you are pregnant, all those hormones and feelings add to it all! I will pray for you guys.
In the meantime, remember that God will grow you in this time. At least there is an end in sight and June will be here before you know it. When I am in the middle of a nasty job, I recite Ephesians 6:7 "Work with enthusiasm, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people." It helps me to stay focused on Him. No matter how nasty those people are, even though it's hard I'm sure, let your light shine through. Another verse that helps me in similar situations is Luke 6:27-30, "...Do good to those who hate you. Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who hurt you. If someone slaps you on one cheek, offer the other cheek also. If someone demands your coat, offer your shirt also. Give to anyone who asks and when things are taken away from you, don't try to get them back." You are probably already familiar with those verses, but I thought I'd pass it along anyway. I refer to both passages often! Like I said, I will pray for your situation. If all else fails, go hang out with the marine life - they seem pretty cool there in Hawaii! :)
I'm sorry you have to deal with such a frustrating situation. We'll be praying for you guys!
Post a Comment